French Girls For Pleasure

By: Rick Stanko
In-House Review - Jun 19 2014

Women. They're beautiful. And soft. And they have vaginas. They're pretty much amazing. The problem with women is that they have free will. Free will to tell you no when you want to stick your wang in 'em. Free will to walk out on you if you stick your wang in them too frequently. Free will to leave you if you stick your wang in some other hot bizzo. With all these free-willed women, what's a dude to do? Women having free will being a problem for dudes who like to fuck is the main theme of French Girls for Pleasure (aka La Femme Objet).
Our story follows a dickbag bearded writer dude. He sits around his house, trying to write, but mostly ends up banging the brunette he lives with. It's a pretty ideal situation. Write a little. Drink a little whiskey. Fuck a little. Then fuck a lot. The hottie he lives with basically lets him stick it in any time he wants. Hell, she'll even let him fuck her from behind while she's doing the dishes. It's pretty much a dream come true. Then one day, she falls in a locked room with a glass window and he can't get in to fuck her. Naturally, he jerks himself off to the sight of her cooze, but it's just not enough (even after he blows his load on the glass). So, he does what any gross looking French asshole with questionable facial hair would, he goes out and brings home a hot blonde for some prime banging. Unfortunately for him, the hot brunette comes home in the middle and ends up packing her stuff into shopping bags and leaving, all while beardo and blondie never actually disentangle his wang from her slit.
Being left by his lady proves no big deal for beardo, since Blondie all too happily moves in and tries to also be a writer and stuff. Problem is, Beardo never lets her get any writing done. As soon as she hits a groove, he sneaks up from behind her and penetrates her before she can even be like, "uh, maybe not now." Eventually, the constant banging proves too much and she "Dear Johns" him, leaving him, once again, without a fuck toy.
Now, Beardo finally wises up that human women just have too many ideas of their own, so he magically becomes a mad scientist type and creates a really, really hot blonde whom he controls with a remote control for white-hot banging. It's all smooth sailing for Beardo, as his new blonde friend is there to exclusively satisfy his sexual desires whenever the fuck he wants. It's rad.
Things once again become problematic for Beardo when his brunette ex shows up and he sics his sex robot chick on her for some hot lesbian action. What he clearly didn't realize is that once you let a chick taste pussy, she will develop all kinds of attitude. Blonde sex robot hottie does just that, somehow getting a hold of her own remote control and uses it to fuck whomever the hell she wants. Shitballs, indeed, for Beardo.
But this Beardo isn't one to lose lightly, so he heads back into the lab and creates a new smoking-hot sex robot chick. This time a black one. He takes her into the bedroom for some banging when the blonde sex robot barges in and, boom, suddenly they're in threesome town. So, really, they all live happily ever after. White sex robot, black sex robot and Beardo until, at least, Beardo, we presume, dies of lung cancer from the approximately 9,000 cigarettes he smokes throughout the course of the movie.