Really? I mean, seriously?

Look, everyone has opinions about contract stars...some folks love em, some folks hate em. Truth is, we have no opinion whatsoever. We have other things to worry about like why Third Degree Films PresidentM and CEO Joey Wilson was at President Obama's health care speech last night and why on earth he felt like calling him a liar. That shit be banana's.

Anyway, news is all over the inter-awesome right now about how Digital Playground has signed yet another new contract star. This one goes by the name Raven Alexis and is apparently, internet famous. We're not sure what that means of course...seems to me that you're either famous or so famous that you're infamous. Internet famous seems like the same thing as saying you're only mildly retarded.

We were confused of course because we thought we read another press release recently stating that they signed up some other bizzo to one of their well crafted, performer friendly contracts. And didn't they just sign some other lady only to change her name to Rio Baloney or something? Are these three different performers or are they the same girl and they can't agree on a name? And while we're at it, how many contract girls do they even have these days? Can anyone keep track? What about Gabriella Fox, is she a real person? She kind of looks like a Real Doll. I know Angelina Armani is real because I have a pair of awesome Armani loafers made out of baby Camel eyelids and Angelina tweets. If you tweet, shit be truth.

It sort of reminds me of when the record labels were buying up independent bands in the early 90's hoping one of them was gonna, "break big". Is that the routine here? Does anyone know?

I mean seriously, if we can't keep track of it, how is anyone else going to...or even care to? Oh wait, you don't.

MRS. DEMEANOR

TMSLEAZE