Last week we invited you to submit your reason why BurningAngel.com should give you a free, one month membership to their porn headquarters. Look, we love you and we believe in giving everyone the chance to enjoy great, pornographic content. Well, you listened and we got tons of submissions. Some not so great, but some were fucking classic. The lovely Joanna Angel reviewed the top ten submissions that we felt were worthy of her attention and the little minx has picked a winner!

So we would love to congratulate Mr. Paul S. You sir, have won! That's right, your submission was picked as the most entertaining and downright retarded. And thus, Ms. Angel has given you keys to the castle!

So how did Mr. S win? Well, first, by being more creative than you. Secondly, for his awesome picture! So to you, the losers, we present the winner in all of his glory:

"Hey,

I should win the sub to BURNINGANGEL.COM because I recently lost both my hands in a bizarre and tragic lawnmower accident, meaning I haven't been able to jerk off and BURNINGANGEL.COM is the only website HOT enough to get me off without even needing hands to touch my junk.

Please see attached photograph for concrete and definative proof of my disabilty and that i'm not making this shit up."

Yes, you could have won, if you didn't suck. Instead, Mr. Paul S. has won and will soon be masturbating violently to all the alt-porn a handless freak could dream of!

Until next time!

GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS 2

TRUE FUCKING LOVE