Man, we thought China was finally getting something right. I mean, sure, they managed to set glorious new standards in human rights and air-quality (unless I read the newspaper backwards, which I very well could have), but man...they've been behind the fuckin' ball on sexual awareness for a while now. It was looking like they were set to make some incredible strides in the public-sexuality forums, when they announced the creation of Love Land, a new theme park devoted to the carnal arts. But then they had to go and fuck the thing up by smashing it all down, before the fucking thing even opened! Try that one on for size, motherfuckers!

The park, which was set to open in October, was meant to promote sexual awareness and education. It was going to feature workshops on sex techniques as well as anti-AIDS education and workshops on the proper use of a condom, something that I thought was pretty straightforward, but hell, China's population might have some different opinions on that one. Inside the park, visitors could groove out on giant sculptures of genitals, sculptures of nude human beings (which, we'll admit, is actually pretty vulgar and inappropriate. Michaelangelo was a sick motherfucker.), sex history exhibits, and surprisingly, no porno.

"Sex is a taboo subject in China but people really need to have more access to information about it," said park manager Lu Xiaoqing. "We are building the park for the good of the public. I have found that the majority of people support my idea, but I have to pay attention and not make the park look vulgar and nasty."

Well, maybe the majority of the public was in support. We're not sure. I guess it's a moot point because the gub'ment stepped in and shut the whole fuggin' joint down, months before the fuckin' place even opened, citing the park's "evil" influence as the reason. Fair enough. We all know sex is an evil act. Just ask Manuel Ferrara.

"The investigation determined the park's content was vulgar and that it was neither healthy nor educational. It had had an evil influence on society and had to be torn down immediately," said a municipal official to local papers.

So, that's a shame. But at least we still have porno, right? That's probably, like, a million billion times better and hotter than anything at the museum, anyway. And if any of you are still dying to check out a foreign country's sex museum, Amsterdam's got a pretty good one. Seriously, they have pictures of horses fucking. I saw it myself. Horses have huge dicks.

And you can smoke really good weed, there. And nail an inexpensive, attractive and clean prostitute afterward.

Just something to keep in mind.

REGISTERED NURSE 2

EVIL ANAL 8