Hey, we just watched this This Ain't Hawaii Five-0 XXX movie, and boy was it fucked up! Instead of talkin' about hanging ten, bustin' perps and gettin' fucked (as one would expect from a porn parody of this caliber), they seemed to spend the majority of the movie talking about obscure curiosites like Aerosmith and poo. See the video (above) for an example.

I think the only thing they did right was casting Jack Lawrence as a cop (in a nice display of casting against type). You fucked up, Stuart Canterbury!

What’s the best thing to do after you break up with a guy/girl? Find some new one to sleep with. That is pretty much the basis of this movie. Alektra Blue and Tommy Gunn both get dragged out by their friends who are trying to get them to hook up with people so they can get over their exes. Before we actually see them meet up and bang we get a whole lot of other penis and vagina match-ups before hand.

Now, we've got nothing against our sister-site (or is it brother-site, I don't fuckin' know) HOMOPOP.com at all. Love the fuck out of them. But we're about to blow them the hell away in terms of gayness. Really.

Well, actually probably not really, because HOMOPOP's pretty gay. I mean, it's called HOMOPOP.

But still, this is, like, waaaaaaaaaay gayer than our usual fare.

Tommy Gunn, perhaps the greatest male performer in the entire pornographic industry, is about to send a major shockwave through the porn industry. No, we're not talking about Phallitrex. We're talking about Tommy's new line of 3-D interactive porno movies! Anybody's who's seen Tommy in action knows that he's far too big a star (with far too big a wang) to be contained by two lousy dimensions.

Here you go fuckaz… Hot on the heels of last weeks gut-busting webisode comes Part Two of our drunken and muscle relaxin’ rampage through the bowels of Edison, NJ's porno extravaganza. We’re pretty sure this is the town where either Thomas Edison was from or at the very least the town where he invented wide open beaves and neck-fucking.

You know, it's not every day that New Jersey gets to host New York's porn expo, so we thought we better grab our fuggin' cameras and groove up North to check out the goings on. Good thing we did, too, because we scored a fucking primo interview with the owner of the most controversial scrotum in pornography (next to Evan Stone), Mr. Tommy Gunn himself!

Aside from our talk with Tommy about the male role in the straight porn business, we also grooved out with Teagan Presley (who isn't even related to Elvis, if you can believe such an act of deception!), Roxy Deville, a guy claiming to be Taryn Thomas and some Canadian babes with a passion for beating up folks with pillows.