Do you remember this gal?

Sure you do! Her name is Stoya. She's a Digital Playground contract star, friend to this here blog and all around nice gal. You might also call her, "The most well known, non-practicing porn star who isn't retired" in the industry". Or, you might just call her a sweet piece of perfect ass.

Some people seem to think that knowledge of a public persona's real name is some kind of power to wield, like an old pulp fantasy novel in which a demon can be summoned by the proper pronunciation of its twelve syllable long name.

It's not.

Before we start, I'll tell you what the best line in this whole video is. It's this: "You'll be fat...as a fuckin' fat retard."

So hey, remember how we said we were gonna milk at least one more episode of our web-video foolishness out of the footage we shot with Stoya last month? Well, fuck, dudes, here it is! In today's video, we'll speak a little bit more with Stoya about what's been going on with her since she disappeared off the face of the Earth last year. Not only that, but we'll also see her tits a little bit, which ought to be cool for you guys, because nobody's seen too much of them since she disappeared off the face of the Earth!

Also, you'll get to see footage of BUCKTON realizing how awful his dick smells! Pure comedy gold!

Hey, Stoya's back!

Kind of. Or not really, I guess. I mean, she's not back shooting new pornography or anything. But, heck, she is back on POPPORN, and that's really what matters to everybody out there, isn't it? No, it's not. But heck, we're gonna go ahead and believe it anyway.

I had a thought this morning: Since condoms in porn are perceived by the adult industry as something that hurts the sales of a movie or scene, would it make a difference if internal (usually called female condoms) were used? So I asked the twitter-verse. The responses directly addressing the use of internal condoms mostly pointed out that they kind of hang out of the vagina and obscure the view of labia. This is probably more unpleasant visually than a traditional male condom. Point taken.

Bad girls know how to have fun. A truer statement could not be said in my opinion. In this outing the baddest of the bad from Digital Playground come out to play. Stoya, Shay Jordan and Gabriella Fox are joined by Serena Del Rio and Kelly Summer for some bad times. Look for plenty of blindfolds and shackles as these ladies take no prisoners in Bad Girls.

Digital Playground is showcasing the 2008 AVN Best New Starlet Stoya in her own Heat movie. This is only the second movie with that title to be released from them, the first being Jesse Jane’s. Stoya is featured in three scenes, including a boy/boy/girl to finish the movie. Priva, Nika Noir and Madison Scott fill out the rest of the cast. So get out of the kitchen if you can’t handle Stoya: Heat.

Whoa. You're not gonna believe this, but we totally got award-winning pornotrician Stoya to appear on our site!

We're not sure how it happened, or why she deemed us worthy, but fuck, we're not gonna ask any questions. The important thing is that Stoya, star of Stoya: Video Nasty and that one scene of Pirates II is being interviewed on POPPORN! This is truly turning point in the history of our quaint little blog. We - what? She's been on our site, like, a billion times?

Here's the thing: in porn, I play a role. Depending on what the movie is, I play different kinds of roles.

[cue laughter about porn chicks not being actresses and whatnot...]

Hey, did you know that we're total winners, here at POPPORN? It's true. Think about it. Why the fuck else would Stoya keep coming back to hang out with us? Either we're total winners in every sense of the word (except the actual "award-winning" sense, of course. Thanks a fucking lot, AVN.), or Stoya just really, really needed to speak out about Kimberly Kane's recent alt-fuckery DVD, Live In My Secrets.

Once asked how she met me, Stoya (you know, the Digital Playground chick who just became AVN's Best New Starlet and shows her face around here sometimes) told the inquiring person, "I got naked in his house."

This is entirely true. She had neon-blue hair and crisscross nipple bars back then, but she otherwise looked exactly the same unclothed. Which I know because that's the state she was in when we met. At my house. And you don't really forget a thing like that, do you? I cannot divulge much about WHY there happened to be a naked Stoya who I'd never previously met in my house just then, but that's the story, and I'm sticking to it.

Listen. In case you haven't guessed by our endless Avengers references, Twin Peaks homages or stories about fictional characters we'd like to groove our wangs into...most of the POPPORN staff are fucking nerds. I mean, we're still way cooler than you (obviously), but we'll admit it...we're geeks. We just as soon whack off to the Borg Queen as Lexi Belle, and we're comfortable with that.

No offense, Lexi.

The other day while we were trolling around the internet (our favorite pastime*) we visited Fleshbot.com.

Lizz is awesome. She's a really close friend and has the best sense of humor ever. This is evidenced by the fact that last week we decided to go to this goth club that we (the collective we, as in the whole big extended group of people I hung out with when I was a teenager) used hang out at because kids are allowed in. This has something to do with the fact that they only open the downstairs bar on those nights. The reason we were going was to have dress up night, and dress up night is much more fun with a theme. Important fact: I haven't been there since I was a teenager.

Hey, they announced the Oscar nominations today! That means award season is in full-fuckin' effect, even if all the relevant awards have already been given out. We're talking about awards like the Golden Globes, the U.S. Presidency, the AVNs, and of course...the one award that makes all other awards look like a steaming pile of cummed-upon horseshit...THE POPPORN.COM PREMIUM FUCK MAKER AWARD!