Ron Jeremy's been around for a while. He's fucked a lot of people. He's formed an unlikely friendship with Tammy Faye. He's even worked with POPPORN (which is the true measure of a successful life, from what I'm told by my inner demons while I cry myself to sleep each night). And now, in what seems like a both incomprehensible and entirely natural move (at the same time), he's apparently moved into the alcohol business. How about that?

Following in the footsteps of such luminaries as Jay-Z and Sammy Hagar, it appears that Vivid’s making booze now! How about that? Let me guess, it looks really crisp and clean and more often than not doesn’t make you cum, right? Ha ha ha ha ha! Seriously, I kid. I just haven’t whacked off to a Vivid movie for a while. Although I did recently check out Mr. Pete’s POV and that shit was cold as ice! And I just love the fuck out of Mr. Pete. But I digress. The point is, Vivid makes booze now!

I guess we lied. We didn't quit doing POPPORN. Obviously. I mean, we posted a new article yesterday. And we have a new video today. So, yeah...I guess we're back. We're sorry.

And hey, what better way to return than with our absolute drunkest video ever?

Well fuckaz.... we pulled it off. POPPORN.com managed to throw a weekend of parties that made Mardi Gras look like tea time with your blind grandma. It made the AVN Awards look like a fuckin' Jonas Brothers concert (without all the underage fucking). Fuck - we even had some of the gayest dudes in Philly strutting around with big raging boners! NOW THAT'S HOT!

So, for the first time since our inception, we're taking the day off.

That's right, Friday, June 20th, POPPORN.com shall lie still while the crew drinks uncontrollably for 72 hours straight.

Perhaps you heard, it's our PARTY WITH PORN STARS WEEKEND? We will miss you if you cannot attend, however, know that we don't really mean that!

MWAH!